Long day. Work was hard, and stressful. A customer came in to place an ad in our new service directory, had to scan a couple logos for him and fine a testimonial from a past customer he likes to use, redesign and get it all set up. While doing all this he is telling me about his 2.5 month wait to find out if had prostate cancer (which he doesn't); we also talk about his FRONT PAGE story written by Rick Steigmeyer http://www.wenatcheeworld.com/news/2010/feb/12/defense-class-flexes-confidence/
While taking care of Greg, and ordering him photos from the story and selling him 4 more copies of the paper I also answered the phone several times and helped three different people at the counter. As usual, one coworker was giving me some dirty looks complete with eye-rolling and another made a couple "interesting" comments. I can't wait for the day to be over and go home to relax.
I come home and Cody asks for a ride to his sisters house which is by Shopko, also by my favorite Chinese restaurant that I wanted to eat at Monday but was closed. I say I will take him there and figure Jake and I can finally have our Chinese food. I get to Shopko and Jake hops out too, I was like WTF??? Jake starts telling me how Cody was supposed to let me know, then Cody buts in. I tell Cody to back off because this is between Jake and I and remind Jake it is HIS job to communicate with me and not Cody's. They boys promise Cody's sister will bring Jake home in an hour. I go grocery shopping and come home. I have another great idea for dinner and am ready to start cooking! Aaron is on the front porch and I tell him Jake should be back shortly. I check my phone and I have multiple messages from CODY asking if Jake can stay a couple more hours, blah blah blah. I try and call Jake, but no answer. I reply back, NO, tell Jake to call me now. Cody texts back acting like he doesn't know what I'm talking about. I tell Cody to just give me the damn address and I will pick Jake up. Finally jake sends a text saying his phone was in his pocket, I'm already on my way to get him, with Aaron. I have to stop for gas because I am almost out, and that pisses me off even more. Aaron and I get to where Jake is and I have texts from Cody "if Joey and I have to stay here that is OK but do we have to" I had no time to answer, all three are piling in my car but it is full of groceries! I finally get them all home, dinner plan two ruined. During all of this my brother is drunk texting asking where the hookers are then wants me to go get his dog, then him and drive him somewhere else. Enough is enough, I say NO! I just want to go cry but have no place to hide.
So after a day from hell I post:
implosion or explosion
Which is it when you have just had enough and feel like emotions could either explode or just shut down entirely? Do I have a choice or does one lead to the other? I want to totally withdraw, sleep, avoid the reality, disappear from the world. Not permanently, not suicidal or anything like that, just really really tired. I care so much that it hurts and leads to me not caring at all
THEN one of Jake's friends, Aaron, is here as I am serving up a very late dinner, pasta, alfredo sauce, frozen chicken breast strips and garlic bread. Aaron is drooling over the food and Jake offers him some, he looks at me and I let him know there is plenty. He DIGS in and then comes back for seconds. Aaron is 18, lives at home in a VERY nice neighborhood and an even NICER house. He is still in high school, good student, no drugs, drinking, etc. Gets good grades, no criminal record, not a fighter, in fact he is really a nice boy to the point of being a goody-two-shoe geek, I love him! He is STARVING. Turns out since he turned 18 his parents no longer feed him more than one meal per day!!! WTF???? So the kid comes to the ghetto to eat, sheesh. Joey, another friend of Jake's, doesn't even like the kid much but Joey told him he could come over to his house anytime he was hungry and he would feed him. I am done feeling sorry for myself now. As crazy as my life can be sometimes, my family does love me and would do anything for me, even if sometimes I have to go a little bat-shit-crazy once in a while.
Now what I need to do is focus on my goals I set for myself:
Go to the gym at LEAST 3 times per week
AND
Take more pictures, I love pictures.
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